Do you remember the last time you received a compliment?
What about the last time you gave a compliment?
I recently received a back-handed compliment that was so cleverly disguised it took me a moment to realize what had actually been said. By this point, I had already thanked the person for the compliment (ha!) which upset me further after I had time to think about it!
So it got me thinking about compliments I pay people.
How I say it, and whether the message is received as intended.
5 Tips On How To Be Kind
1. Give A Short And Sweet Compliment
Kind: I love your new haircut!
Unkind: I love your new haircut! That looks so much better than the last style you had for three years …
2. Make A Heartfelt Gesture
Kind: Please go ahead of me at the check out, I’m not in any rush!
Unkind: Please go ahead of me at the check out. I can see you have no control over your children and I don’t want to hear them whinging while I pay for my groceries.
3. Reach Out To A Person In Need
Kind: I heard you have been sick recently, can I do some shopping for you or help with any housework?
Unkind: I heard you have been sick recently, I hope you don’t spread the germs around to the rest of us.
4. Talk To A Shy Person
Kind: I see you’re new here, let me introduce you to some other people.
Unkind: <crickets> Seeing someone new to a group struggling to connect and saying nothing at all.
5. Smile
Kind: Smiling is infectious! Offer a smile to someone in the elevator, walking past colleagues in the hallway or at the shop owner as you enter the store.
Unkind: Not returning a smile offered freely.
You may not feel comfortable doing one, or perhaps all, of the these examples! I know some of my friends would rather chew their arm off before offering a smile to a stranger. This doesn’t mean they’re unkind, they just show kindness in other ways. 🙂
What acts of kindness would you include to this list?
I think it is a kindness to acknowledge kindness from others. If someone pays a compliment, holds the door, picks up something you dropped, etc., repay them with a smile and a genuine “Thank you!”. Sincere gratitude is all too rare these days and brightens the day for the recipient as much as they brightened yours.