Hoarding: 7 Lies That Keep You Caught In Clutter

Are You Lying To Yourself About Hoarding?

Hoarders on Oprah

Oprah has yet another show about hoarders this week. It got me thinking about the lies we tell ourselves to avoid letting go of the stuff that fills up our homes and lives.

Of course extreme hoarding can be associated with psychiatric disorders. More commonly, though, we justify mounting mounds of matter with the little lies we tell ourselves.

Here are 7 of the most common self-delusions I hear, along with a decent dose of reality.

1. I don’t have time

I have no doubt you’re time-poor – nearly everyone today is.

But how much time do you lose each day to:

  • feeling frustrated
  • shopping for things you already have, but can’t find
  • feeling bad about your home and inventing excuses to stop people coming over
  • searching the rubble for papers, sunglasses, your youngest child
  • being unproductive because your office is a mess

Think about all the time you lose over a year. You could gain more than that back with just a little daily decluttering.

Take 10 minutes to get rid of stuff you’ve been hoarding today. Don’t be surprised if you gain 30 or more minutes in productivity right away.

2. It will be awful, horrible, painful; did I mention awful?

The pain of taking action is over quickly, but the pain of living in clutter can be yours to love and cherish for the rest of your life.

The truth is, the anticipation of decluttering is far, far worse that the decluttering itself.

Don’t believe me? Take a look at these comments from people who, like you, dreaded the deed. They sound happy, don’t they? Hmmm…

3. It’s too hard

If you’re talking about organizing your entire home, car, and office all at once then yes, it is. You wouldn’t catch me doing it, no matter how much chocolate you offered me. (Just how much chocolate are we talking about?)

Don’t even try to organize everything or tackle a lifetime of hoarding all at once. Start with something small – a drawer, a paper pile, a mound that’s starting to evolve its own ecosystem. Do a little each day. It might take you a month, or three months, or a year. But it won’t be too hard at all.

4. I’ll do it later

Um, no you won’t. You know it, I know it, your husband/wife/best friend knows it. Let’s move on.

5. I like it this way

If I had a dollar for every But-I’m-happy-this-way person who, after finally getting rid of things they’d been hoarding, admitted they’d been kidding themselves big time – well, I’d have a lot of dollars.

This is the mother of all clutter self-delusions. Bust yourself on it, start releasing things that don’t enhance your life, and enjoy denial-free happiness.

6. It’s not that bad

It could be worse, that’s true. But please, dear reader, don’t choose that as a yardstick for your life.

If excessive stuff is costing you serious time, money and peace of mind, it is that bad. Start letting go of things you don’t need or love today.

7. I can keep it if I want

This is a completely reasonable assertion – if you’re 4. Otherwise, a more helpful one might be ‘I can be happy and feel good about my space if I want’.

Yes, you certainly can – and all it will take is big dose of reality and a little time most days to chip away at your clutter.

Be happy and feel good about your space. That’s my wish for you.

Your say

What lies have you been telling yourself to justify hoarding stuff that doesn’t enhance your life? And are you ready to bust yourself on it? Share your story in the comments.

[Image: http://www.flickr.com/photos/62904109@N00/ / CC BY 2.0]

Michele | Get Organized Gal

Michele is into writing, books, simplicity, love, TV, productivity, and staying thin in a world of chocolate.

53 thoughts on “Hoarding: 7 Lies That Keep You Caught In Clutter”

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  8. Lisa says:

    My sister is hoarding and I believe that she is psychologically ill. She cannot get rid of stuff that belongs to her childhood and that are broken. It is very depressive to see. I have stopped visiting her because there is no place to sit and have a good time. It saddens me a lot.

    Reply
  9. Lisa says:

    My sister is hoarding and I believe that she is psychologically ill. She cannot get rid of stuff that belongs to her childhood and that are broken. It is very depressive to see. I have stopped visiting her because there is no place to sit and have a good time. It saddens me a lot.

    Reply
  10. JoeTaxpayer says:

    Holly, your idea is great.
    I am in my 40’s, and have t-shirts that have sentimental value to me, but they don’t fit after 25 years. Boxes of shirts are now a few MBs of memory as digital snapshots on my Mac. I’m slowly going through boxes of stuff and reducing the mess.
    2 old computers I loved? Well, if they can’t even browse at good speed, why am I keeping them? Out they go. Along with all the peripherals that only work with them. Remember SCSI? It was before USB and Firewire. A 3GB drive? The drive uses more power every month than the memory is even worth. Out it goes.
    After seeing the stuff her grandparents accumulated and helping to throw things out after her gramps died, my (then) 7 year old told me “dad, please clean up that mess in the basement, Mom and I don’t want to have to throw it all out when you die.” hmmm…..

    Reply
  11. JoeTaxpayer says:

    Holly, your idea is great.
    I am in my 40’s, and have t-shirts that have sentimental value to me, but they don’t fit after 25 years. Boxes of shirts are now a few MBs of memory as digital snapshots on my Mac. I’m slowly going through boxes of stuff and reducing the mess.
    2 old computers I loved? Well, if they can’t even browse at good speed, why am I keeping them? Out they go. Along with all the peripherals that only work with them. Remember SCSI? It was before USB and Firewire. A 3GB drive? The drive uses more power every month than the memory is even worth. Out it goes.
    After seeing the stuff her grandparents accumulated and helping to throw things out after her gramps died, my (then) 7 year old told me “dad, please clean up that mess in the basement, Mom and I don’t want to have to throw it all out when you die.” hmmm…..

    Reply
  16. Holly says:

    Dee,

    Another thing that might be useful for your mom – take pictures or videos of things that have memories attached before giving them away. Seeing the pictures or videos can help her remember but not take up space.

    Reply
  17. Holly says:

    Dee,

    Another thing that might be useful for your mom – take pictures or videos of things that have memories attached before giving them away. Seeing the pictures or videos can help her remember but not take up space.

    Reply
  20. Dee says:

    I am going though this with my mother. She is moving to a smaller home and we have been sorting through her things for months in preparation for the move. She is attached to her possessions b/c of memories and for a woman who has lost all but one of her children as well as her husband, memories are really important to her. It helps that I am not attached to many of her things, making it easier to persuade her to let go of them. The tip here is to enlist a friend to help you see your things differently. For instance, it’s time to give away the electric wok that has not been used in 5 years and how many mugs from all those vacation spots does one need?

    Since my mother is from the war era, when one needed to reuse and recycle, throwing away perfectly good things is not a part of her reality. So, donating them eases the pain – knowing they will be put to use by someone else.

    Reply

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