The way you feel about yourself is a tricky thing.
No one wants to be egotistical or overconfident. But most us are more likely to err in the opposite direction – to be unsure, self-doubting, lacking in self-esteem.
A library of self-help books and/or years of therapy can maybe help.
But for a simpler approach, you might like to try these ideas.
1. Be Responsible-ish With Money
It’s hard to think well of yourself if you don’t take basic care of you. And taking care of your finances is a big part of self-care.
Prioritize your spending so that bills and essentials get covered before indulgences – at least much of the time.
Observing yourself as you manage your money well is sure to help you feel better about yourself.
2. Practice Self-Reliance
Few things are more helpful to your self-esteem than knowing you can survive on your own.
By all means enjoy, love, and spend time with people you care about. But also take time for just you.
Get to know yourself and become comfortable with your own company. The sense that you’re with people because you want to be, not because you have to be, is comforting.
3. Start A New Chapter
If your past has been difficult then it’s easy to get stuck in those old memories and feelings. Working through them can take a long time.
But right now, today, you can think of yourself as starting a new chapter. Of course this doesn’t mean the past is erased, and there may still be emotional work to do to heal it.
Still, you can turn the page and let yourself focus on the next phase of your story. And make sure you are the hero.
4. Look Your Best
There’s much more to who you are than how you look. Having said that, making an effort to present yourself well is almost certain to lift your mood and help you like yourself more.
Get a good haircut, buy a cute outfit, ask a stylish friend how to improve your personal presentation.
Then, every day, take the time to put on clothes that suit you, do something with your hair, and give yourself a little zhuzh.
5. Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone
Doing something that’s somewhat radical for you can expand the way you see yourself.
Even if you’re terrible at it, the mere act of trying something new can help you to feel brave, and to open up your self-concept.
Go ballroom dancing, join the gym, start a tantric yoga class – whatevs. Just experiment with parts of you that you haven’t yet met.
You might really like them. 🙂
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My group decisions are as follows:
1. Be Responsible-ish With Money
And taking care of your finances is a big part of self-care.
Prioritize your spending so that bills and essentials get covered before indulgences – at least much of the time. Pay bills on the 3rd of the month; save money for grocery shopping; goal: save $100 a month – in an emergency you will have to use the saved money. Record your expenses on a spread sheet daily, weekly or monthly. Realistically you should have money saved one or two months ahead so you have a fall back.
Observing yourself as you manage your money well is sure to help you feel better about yourself.
2. Practice Self-Reliance
Being independent makes you happy & gives you the growth you need to be independent including making your own life’s decisions.
ME time is one or two hours a day. This is your time.
3. Start a New Chapter
Consider therapy to talk about old bad memories & feelings have that are not healthy for you. Growing up your parents does not make the right decisions for all their children.
Of course this doesn’t mean the past is erased [keep the good & positive from your past], and there may still be emotional work to do to heal it. You have to take the bad times of your past & accept it/don’t dwell on the past mistakes.
You have to create a lifestyle that you can live.
4. Look Your Best
Personal Presentation: Wear clean clothes that look good on you; keep your hair maintained & good hygiene; put a smile on your face and go out into the world for your daily activities.
5. Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone
Outside your comfort zone: exercise; escalators; etc.
This is awesome, and a few good new tips for me to try!
Hope they work for you Jen! 🙂
The timing for this couldn’t have been better! I recently turned 40 and it has led to some serious evaluation of myself and how I have been neglecting me in my efforts to care for my three children, build my career, and run a household. I look forward to trying all of them!
A happier you will make you a BETTER mother, employee, everything! You might also like this Hollyce: http://www.getorganizedwizard.com/blog/2009/06/11-great-reasons-to-be-happy/ 🙂
These were so good and just what I needed at this moment. As for #4, just taking the time to get dressed, fix my hair and putting on a little make upl can make a big difference. The days I do that, I feel so different than the ones where I just stay in my sweats and slippers. Thank you for this.
My pleasure Jacquie! And I so agree – I’ve found those few minutes can really pay off when I’m not feeling my best. You might also like this: http://www.getorganizedwizard.com/blog/2013/04/prescription-for-happiness-personal-organization/ 🙂
Like the information on this site. thanks
Like the information on this site. thanks
Cool – thanks Samantha!
I think #5 is the best way for anyone to feel better about themselves. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in what you know instead of putting yourself out there. But once you do you open yourself to a world of new experiences. Even if it’s not successful, just knowing you’ve tried and are capable of doing something different is a huge ego booster. 🙂
Very true Mridu!
I love that this list is 4/5 about what we DO rather than how we LOOK. These are solid and doable. Thank you.
Two thoughts:
While I agree with #4 wholeheartedly, I have a hard time promoting it, when there is SO much of that everywhere. I was up most of the night writing about my thoughts on the latest physical beauty narrative — this time from Dove. Perhaps this will be useful to someone.
http://pix2brix.com/why-i-love-dove-real-beauty-sketches-also-hate-it/
Also, on #5, an old friend of mine wrote a great book years ago on that subject called “Kissing a Frog: Four Steps to Finding Comfort Outside Your Comfort Zone.” It’s got some great insights, if you can find a copy.
Best wishes.
Thank you for your thoughts and for sharing these resources Alison. Dove is owned by the world’s third-largest consumer goods company, so I guess we need to consider their motives in that light. 🙂